"Teeth are so frustrating!" "Not if you take care of them."

I hate this.

So, as you probably know (from my thousands of tweets) my retainer doesn't fit anymore and I had an orthodontist appointment today for the first time in about 3 months. (not going to explain that).

I walk into the Ortho. office and the assistant lady goes "Hiya, sweetheart. What's this I hear about your retainer?" I thought, "Oh great, when Dad called to make the appointment he warned them. That's gotta be better, at least they know. Right?". Well, I told her it wasn't snapping shut anymore and she said "Oh, I'll go get Doc. and we'll start in a second." "Okay, I'm going to go brush me teeth." So I did.

I sit down in the chair and he tries putting in my retainer. Surprise, surprise. Doesn't fit. He then calls for my Mom to come in. She does. *ten minutes pass of him just looking at my teeth, bitting down when he tells me, opening wide when he tells me again*.

After all of that my Orthodontist tells me. "You have two options. Option one is get braces again for a few months then get this permanent wire in the back of your teeth. If that wire screws up or is defective after a while you will use this *holds up invisible retainer*. Option two is to get a series of retainers. You'd need about five and change ever few months BUT YOU MUST ALWAYS WEAR YOUR RETAINER OR THIS WOULD BE NO GOOD. The braces is about 2500 dollars and the retainers would be about 900. It's up to you. Call us back when you've reached a decision as a family."

And while he's saying this I'm laying in the chair looking up and the celling holding in my tears. And the assistant lady is all like "it's your responsibility, what are you going to do when you start driving? aren't you fifteen?" blah blah blah. And it's taking EVERYTHING inside of me not to start crying.

Another 15 minutes later my Mother has finished asking her stupid questions (My Dad took me the time I got my retainer so she was so confused on everything.) and I'm done being hassled that it's all my fault, and I should wear my retainer and stuff we're pretty much done talking. The assistant lady could tell that my eyes we watering up and she goes "It's okay, Sierra."

Yupp, it's totally not.

I tired explaining to my Mother that if I cared what my teeth looked like I might actually wear my retainers. And that we should have never done braces in the first place because it was optional and it would just cost a butt load of money. I mean yeah, my teeth were screwed up BAD. But, it wasn't going to cause me any harm over the years and I would still live a happy healthy life. But, no. I got braces.

So now it's deciding what to do. Of course I'm pushing for the retainers because it's cheapest and I already feel terrible for wasting thousands of dollars on my crappy teeth, but I'm going to need help remembering to wear them 24/7.

Oh and also, I don't think it's possible for anyone to make me feel worse than the Doctor, my Mother, and assistant lady did because I basically screwed everything up. And I'm pretty much the screw-up child that never does anything right and is totally worthless.

Thanks, guys.